One of my boys is at the movies with friends. This lead me to think about the last time me and the boys went to a movie, together as a group. I think it was Transformers. At this movie, it was decided, by the boys, that we would not sit together. I can handle that. They also decided that they were not going to sit with each other either. So here we are, the three of us, all sitting in different areas of the movie theater, having a great time.

spca hates families, single mom style

I have a problem with the SPCA. Basically, they are power-tripping hypocrites.  I have had pets most of my life, and have always gotten them fixed, even when money was tight. And because I do love animals and don't want to cause them grief, I do not eat them either.  My first clue that they are not what they appear, is the fundraising hotdog sales.

When I had my store, we were next door to a book store whose owner had cats from the SPCA that were available for adoption. Occasionally, they would visit us. When the book store closed, the SPCA wanted another store to display the cats because if people could see and pet the cats, this would help in the adoption of them.  So the SPCA officials stopped by and asked if we would be interested. We talked about it and decided that we often had hazardous chemicals around so perhaps it would not be really safe for a cat.  Yet, lately there had been ads in the paper looking for foster homes for pets, and the conversation went like this:

ME:  I would like to ask you about fostering some cats, because I've had lots of cats, and I see that you are looking for some foster homes.

SPCA: Do you have kids?

ME: Yes.


There is silence. I cannot believe my ears.  Did I just get denied the fostering of cats? Was I just refused my volunteering to the SPCA? Does this mean that the SPCA hates children? Oh my God!

A month or so latter, a local mom sent a letter was sent to the local paper because the SPCA refused her a kitten because she had small children in the home.  My friend Barb got a 4 page questionnaire on her personal life to determine her eligibility. I have been talking to people lately about the SPCA only to find out that they are seriously mishandling everything.

You see, I will be taking the SPCA to court. My daughter really wanted to have a dog, so she applied for one, jumped through the hoops, spent $200 on the dog, plus $50 on supplies, and brought the dog home. But, the SPCA had lied to my daughter's landlord about this dog's character. They also lied to my daughter about the behavior of this dog. Now this dog creates $1,000 worth of flooring and carpet damages! My daughter is crying, now she will have to pay for all these damages. I tell her to return the dog, which she does, and shows them photos of the damage. They then say that this dog has shown "separation anxiety" before and that's what has happened. In other words, they lied about the dog's behavior.

I write the SPCA, they say that they will only talk to my daughter about this. My daughter is still upset and never wants to have a dog again. The SPCA also kept all of her money. Now I am pissed off. I write the regional SPCA to get a response, of which, of course, has been ignored.  So now I am going to sue the SPCA for damages, for selling a destructive animal.

Every so often I read about how the SPCA has continued with its mishandling of events, their attitudes towards ordinary people who want to love an animal, their egotistical, power-tripping, deceptive practices. I've had to take my ex to court for child support, I know how to do the paperwork, and I'm pissed!!

Single mothers and sharing the bed

Fact is, I don't like sleeping with anyone. Never did, never will. I don't want anyone breathing in my face. Nor do I want them snoring in my ear. This mild aversion has turned into a major irritation over the years, probably due to the fact that sleeping soundly gets more difficult as you get older. I don't recall it being a really big problem until I had children, then any sound would wake me up.  From the awakening sounds of a baby, to the brain drilling sounds of snoring. Then, after I had a baby snooze with me, it became that any movement would wake me up. I had become a human sound and motion detector.

So now, in order to get any decent amount of sleep, I must sleep alone. And I suspect that this may be causing a little unspoken friction between me and the boyfriend. He likes to cuddle or snuggle or just be close. Meanwhile, if I have a night of such, I will wake up with a headache. Way too many morning headaches has told me this. 

It probably does not help that I do not live with my boyfriend, and therefore am not getting used to sleeping with him. But I was married for 5 years and I never got used to it then.  I will actually change ends in the middle of the night. Head at the north end at bedtime, then later finding myself moving the pillow to the south end, which is fine if you sleep alone.

And I have tried. When we went camping a couple of weekends ago, the first night sleeping together was okay, but after the second night I awoke with a headache.

I have said, over and over again, that it would be so much easier if we were to get a king size bed for my house. I said that I would manage on the size of a twin bed, although I am used to a double and a queen. But he said no, that I should save my money, I offered that we could split the cost, but he said no. Perhaps he just finds it hard to believe that it is so difficult to sleep with someone.  Hey, I even quite sleeping with the kids after one rolled over and smacked me in the face. I kept a foamie and blanket under my bed, right beside me, for the nights when the kids came into my room in the night.

The boyfriend and I have talked about living together at some point in the next couple of years, and I have told him that I would like my own room. I think he thinks I'm joking.

Single moms and a housing complex

I think I have been spoiled. I swallowed my false pride and moved into government housing about 8 years ago, aka affordable housing, aka housing complex. This is a new building in this town, so it has fairly new everything. When this place first opened, it was bad with drugs and low lifes, and the cops were here every week.  A new manager started here and cleaned it up. Slowly the scum of society left, and in came single moms.  And no more police visits. So I started to keep track of activities and noticed a couple of things.

When the police were involved around here, it had something to do with a man. Either he was drunk, or driving fast, or creating a scene, or something. When it is just woman and their kids, things go fairly smoothly around here. But now there is a new manager.

She is letting in druggies. She says she goes by the paperwork that they present, but I can tell by looking at them that they are losers.  These women also don't seem to have jobs, nor do they go to school. So now the police visits are starting up.

One of these women, who's home reeks of pot, moved in with her daughter. Two weeks later the son moved in and since then things have started going missing and he is verbally abusive to the younger kids. I complain to management.

The other one moved in with her 3 children yet her boyfriend/husband was there all the time. He is the one that swears at the 7 year old. I complain to management. Now there are druggies trying to get something from these people, trying to enter their home with them in it. And when that doesn't succeed, they steal from a few vehicles here, including mine. They actually ripped off my sun visor in order to take the visor with the CD hold on it. I complain to management. I file a report with the police. 

I know I am wasting my time. But I am mad. I don't like living here anymore. I hate that society has come to where this is the norm - having things stolen. I wish I could pick off these thieves with a rifle. Management says that government housing is for people that are have difficulty finding housing, from needing wheelchair access to living on disability payments. And I agree with that. But this is not these people's problems. They are druggies and thieves, was that on their application?

I use to be a safe house worker among other things, it did not take long for me to see that I am not helping anyone. These woman just work the system, trying to get whatever they can for free, and know what to say to get it. And, a lot of the women I 'helped' didn't even have custody of their children, they were in foster care or with the other parent. 

All of these scum bags and losers just use the system to keep on getting, while you and I keep trying to improve our lives and our children's lives, the right way. By going back to school and putting the children first, and being the best parent we can be while not lying and cheating our way through it.

So now I think I must be a security freak, making sure I never open a ground floor window. On the second floor I must make sure to not let the windows go past the window tabs, both top and bottom. But it is also getting very hot out, and I want my air conditioning unit in my window, so now what?  The druggies and their druggie stupid friends will see an in, even if it is the second floor.

I think I will get a gun.

You know you are a Militant Single Mom when....

You know you are a Militant Single Mom when:
Real garbage bags are a luxury item.
You have actually darned a sock.
Men get less appealing every year.
A vehicle with no reverse is still a vehicle that runs.
Sheets have doubled as curtains.
You rediscover peanut butter and jam sandwiches, from necessity.
Read the Riot Act to the kids before entering a store.
You realize that some days are not worth the make up.
You know all the words to Hannah Montana’s theme song.
You know that the transformer Bumble Bee is a 1973 Camero. 
You double recipes so you will have one effort, two dinners.
You sing because it is a hobby that doesn't cost anything.
You ask your daughter for her old makeup because you can't afford any.
You start thinking that marrying for love is overrated.
You taught the kids to swim in a lake, not pool.

You haven’t finished a thought in your head since . . .

Single moms, step siblings, and family

It has been a wonderful month so far, full of family stuff. Got to meet up with my ex-step siblings that I haven't seen in 14 years - wonderful people! Then my sister, whom I haven't seen in 3 years (we are miles apart) came up to town here and we all went camping - lots of laughs! Last weekend was my boyfriend's sister-in-law's birthday, with all her family, another camping weekend - I paddled a canoe for the first time!

I miss family. A month ago, my mom was talking to my sister about wanting to go and live on Slater street again (where I grew up, with my future steps down the road), meanwhile, me and step-sister Wendy are talking on Facebook about wanting Slater street back again. Coincidence I suppose.

In order for us to have Slater street back again, means that we never should have left it, or at least left the city that it is in. So that's the problem right there. My mom and sister are still in Slater Street town, but the rest of us kids are anywhere from 10 hours driving time away, to almost living on the other coast.

And we have all talked, and we all want to be near each other again. So what is the moral of this story? I'm not sure. Perhaps we want to be with the people that we have endured with. People that we don't have to get to know. People that we can just be ourselves with.

Arnold Schwarzenegger and his irresponsibility

I don't know what is with men most of the time. And society. And the media. Arnold Schwarzenegger has fathered another child with someone who is not his wife, and allowing this child to be raised without a father. 

After I first heard about this, and the other quasi-facts that she pursued him, already had three children, and worked in a domestic-type job, I didn't take me long to figure this one out.  And good for her!

I have three children, and if I were working at a domestic type position, with perhaps union wages but it is never enough, and there was someone that I could get close enough to, that had millions of dollars,  with continuing royalties, and was known for skanking around, I would be planning my future five digit child support payments really quick. That woman has hit the child support lottery!!